March 2005

On the Web

• Writing, Briefly: Excellent writing tips from Paul Graham.
• Typecasting: The Use (and Misuse) of Period Typography in Movies.
• Frusion Breakfast Brawl: Addictive Punch Out-style Flash game.
• “The Most Expensive Album Never Made”: Detailed history of Guns ’N’ Roses’ doomed Chinese Democracy.
• Pimp My Safari: New online hub for Safari browser customization from Jon Hicks.
• Guess the Dictator and/or Television Sit-Com Character: This online game of 20 (or more) questions is actually quite difficult to… See more →

boss stands corrected
but for my magniloquence
I receive nothing

I forgot your meds
but I will not temporize
on your surgery

If you told me, in any tone approximating enthusiasm, that you had visited my site in the last year or so (for a reason other than the out-of-left-field hit, Virtual Stan), you would have been met with an incredulous look. This incredulity would have had nothing to do with false modesty or my tendency toward self-deprecation or my inability to believe that you had managed to operate a web-accessible digital device. It would be a… See more →

spry, laughing children
an aliment of the soul
and also the wolves

one rake, ten acres
you better believe I’ve learned
to contemn the leaves

Dear The Monkey,

My cubicle-mate at work smells like whatever he ate for breakfast all day long. Does he even know how to use utensils or does he just eat with his hands?! Ew. How can I tell him that his odor is an offense to others without hurting his feelings too badly?

Sincerely, Positively Uncouth

The Monkey Responds:

Your coworker suffers from a rare condition called handspophobia. Its name combines hand and spo, which are… See more →

my head is a peach
swarm of pestiferous flies
descends to devour

never you worry
everything’s copacetic
Grace Jones has arrived

stupid cover band
“Rock Lobster” forces you to
join the lumpen dance

taketh now the reins
my stygian bondservant
we ride to Wal*Mart

garish redesign
all furbelow, no function
Rob Weychert dot com